Ok, I am no advice columnist, neither a psychologist nor specialized in any way in men’s psychology. I am just another woman who has her opinions.
They say, men and women always end up on the opposite ends. Women complain about how insensitive and “gross” men are and men whine about the cry-babies women can turn into.
Granted, there are differences but we have to learn to live with them, right?
Lets start with relationships. Men are committed. Period. If he is committed to you once probably he will remain committed to you for the rest of his life. But the problem is that you don’t really know when he is really committed. Sometimes women ‘think’ men are serious about the relationship but they are not and then they ‘cheat’ on the women.
Ok Consider this: When a relationship ends, a woman will cry and pour her heart out to her girlfriends, and she will write a poem titled "All Men Are Idiots". Then she will get on with her life. A man has a little more trouble letting go. Six months after the break-up, at 3:00 a.m. on a Saturday night, he will call and say, "I just wanted to let you know you ruined my life, and I’ll never forgive you, and I hate you, and you’re a total floozy. But I want you to know there’s always a chance for us".
Another thing women need to understand and tolerate is that men are big kids (Com’ on guys, accept it!). Deep down, all men are big ol' boys. (This explains why so many grown men wear baseball caps.) Their interests are boy-like, too. Take his obsession with sports. Most men love anything that involves kicking something, throwing things or punching other men. Sounds like 10-year-olds on the playground to you? Does to me. When you put three or more men together, they bond by yelling at the TV and being idiots to each other. Regressing into childlike behavior isn't just a means of amusing themselves — it's their way of escaping real-life pressures and feeling accepted as they are. There's no point in denying guys time to release their juvenile side. And hey, at least they're doing it during boys' night out and not in front of your friends or family!
Another thing I have learnt from my day to day life is that men don’t take hints. Whether its your friend, husband, boyfriend or brother, they just don’t. I think it is because when men are with other men, they don't tiptoe around each other and drop subtle suggestions. That's because hints don't register with guys. Women pride themselves on being able to know intuitively what their friends, husbands and kids are thinking, but men have no interest in reading minds. That's I've learned from men: "If you don't ask, you don't get." In relationships, I don't expect a guy to know exactly what I want — and whenever I do, I'm disappointed. If, for example, you want him to take you out for your birthday, you're wasting your time dropping hints like "Guess what day Friday is? It's someone's birthday!" If you do that, you'll be 80 before he takes you out. And while you're at it, don't hint about wanting a gift that's shiny and lasts forever: To him, you've just described a set of Emeril pots and pans.
But, if you do ask, chances are you will get it. Be it an expensive ring or a loving kiss, don’t hesitate to ask them for it.
Coming down to a more domestic level, women should all know that men don’t do their laundry until they are out of clean clothes. If this happens before then that means someone else is doing their laundry for them. Sometimes, their dirty laundry even comes in several categories: Looks fine/smells fine, Looks fine/smells bad, Looks dirty/smells fine. Unless you intend to wash it, do not try to disrupt piles organized in this manner.
A couple more things to keep in mind:
Don’t make him hold your purse in the mall. It does something to their manhood. Just spare him the misery.
Shopping is not fascinating. Ever.
If he has to sit through “Notting Hill”, you have to sit through “Showgirls”.
If you truly want honesty, don’t ask questions you don’t really want the answer to.
He was not looking at that other girl. Well, okay… maybe a little. Okay, so what! He was looking at her. Big deal. Like you never looked at another guy…
Any sort of injury involving the testicles is not funny. Seriously.
Remember: that Nair bottle looks an awful lot like shampoo if left in the shower.
Any attempt by a man to prepare food, no matter how feeble (ie: Microwaving a burrito, fixing Spaghetti, etc) should be met with roughly the same degree of praise a parent might shower upon their infant when it walks for the first time.
But in the end, remember that men are human. We all are. We are unique and we have our own individuality. You will not go anywhere in understanding someone if you keep on putting them in one stereotypical category or another.
Good luck Ladies! :-)
(Some ideas taken from Cosmopolitan Magazine, Forgot the exact issue)
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