If you are a regular reader of this blog, you have seen these before, and hopefully liked these quotes too. If you are new to the blog, these are true quotes and incidents from the people I interact with.  Please feel free to dig into the archives by clicking on “Funny Quotes” on the menu bar above.  I hope you have as much fun reading them as I have compiling them.  Thank you for sharing with me my silly life.


Don't fall for the British accent. It’s just the same B.S. that gets said over here; it just sounds different.
-Joe, giving last minute advise for visiting Europe. 


How did the parents of hogwarts not file a lawsuit? With giant snakes, spiders, and escaped convicts running rampant, its breeding grounds of litigation action.
-Jake


You should have already done your first draft yourself.  The first drafts are those hideous things that should never see the light of day. Don’t let them leave your laptop.
-Professor, about starting our thesis


How does an 'A' paper make me feel? It makes me feel good about you, and confident in you, and then it keeps getting depressing from there. B, C, D… and then an F paper is… you are dead to me.
-the same professor, on grading.


Me: What can you do when someone's car alarm starts and blares for the whole damn night?
Jenn: Sledgehammer. There is not a jury in the world that would convict.
-after staying up most of the night because of that alarm.


Every year more and more countries are allowing more and more people to marry whoever they want to marry... or whoever they can get to marry them.
-Bee, on gay marriage 


So what happens now? Does anyone remember this from last year? *Silence* Does anyone remember last year at all?
- Finance Professor, while explaining a concept we learned (or should have learned) during our first year


We are on a house fly hunting mission. There are three house flies in my kitchen. If you see them, you show them no mercy.
-the instructions my friend received upon entering my apartment.