Bad Day

I was having a bad day. A very bad one. Something really precious was slipping out of my hands and no matter what I did, I wasn't able to put it back together.
With a heavy heart I made my way to the cafe to grab a sandwich. I eat when I am depressed. I absentmindedly stood in line and on my turn, placed an order for a sandwich of the first thing that came to my mind.

It was then when I noticed the guy behind the counter looking quite sad and edgy at the same time. It looked like he was having as bad of a day as I was. As I waited I continued observing his words, his actions - they all spoke of sadness. I sighed. He was clumsy a couple of times too while making sandwiches, and that would frustrate him even more.

When he finally spilled mayonnaise, and was about to yell, I instinctively reached up to him and said,  "We all have days like this. Its alright."

He looked up to me for a moment, and I smiled at him, while I saw his lips curling into a weak smile as well.

"You've got a lovely smile there Miss," he finally spoke. 

"Thank you, tomorrow will be better, you know," I replied.

And I saw his facial expressions calmed all of a sudden. He smiled again, and his eyes dilated, his hunched shoulders relaxed. I almost felt good about myself at that moment.

I waited for him to finish making my sandwich. He quietly put it together and while handing it to me, he looked at me and said, "Thanks, I needed that."

I gave him my best smile and as I turned around, I realized that sometimes in order to heal yourself you need to reach out to someone else.

Faith

"At the end of the day faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don't really expect it. It's like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And it's not so important happy ever after, just that its happy right now. See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you, and once in a while people may even take your breath away."

Unpredictability

We think that we have it all figured out, and all under control. But the truth is, we don't know jack. When we wake up each morning, we have no idea who's arms we are going to end up in at night, how many snowflakes we are going to catch, and who is going to leave us eternally before the day is through.

I took this photograph without knowing how my day would end and it ended in unexpected ways. It was snowing magic that day. I will always remember this photograph, because it reminded me of life - the way it keeps changing and the way you cannot rely on it.

And Love – the way it is so unpredictable and dynamic. Perhaps that’s what makes it so great.

[2] Funny Valentine

Love, when sprinkled with some humor is the best treat.

Following are moments in time - said, said to, overheard, told in stories, recalled during drunken moments, and teased about. Needless to say, X is a woman and Y is a man -- I have to maintain their privacy :-).


Y: Its not fair. It is not fair. It is so not fair.
X: What?
Y: That smile.
You can't just smile at me like that. Then I have to say yes! Not cool missy!
---

Y: I was thinking you just don't talk while making love.
X: Yes, you are right, mostly I don't. My mouth has better things to do.
---

Y: But you are my sweetheart, you are the cherry on my strawberry cake...oh sorry, cherry is an inappropriate word.
---

X: Wow.... this was a good kiss!
Y: What are you trying to say about all the other ones?
---

X1: What are you doing for Valentines day?
X2: You mean, besides him? (looking at her boyfriend)
---

X: In bed I can be quite mischievous, especially with the men I really like... wait... that did not come out right.
Y: No, it didn't... I really hope you are only with the man you *really* like :P
---

Y1: So did you ever work up the nerve to talk to that girl?
Y2: Yeah, one time she sneezed and I said 'God bless you.'
---

X to Y: Alright, alright. I will kill you softly. Oh, I mean kiss you softly.
---

Talking to her two male friends...
Raaji: I don't know how people have the guts to cheat on their partners. I mean, why can't they just break up first before they go on to pursue their new love interests. I can only do one man at a time.
*they stare*
Raaji: Oh, that did not sound right.
Rob: Gee Raaji. Who are you doing these days?
Matt: Raaji is doing someone!
*both high five*
Raaji: I did not mean it that way!

but of course it was too late for that....
---

:-)

Half & Half

We can always find people who will look at this glass and say that it is half full and people who will say that it is half empty and that is how we have defined the two types of people. But are there really two types?

I have learned that the world is so much more complex and it belongs to people who look at it and say, What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass! Who's been stealing my water?

And people who will take their glass and pour water out of it into the half full or half empty glasses just to alley those who are dissatisfied with their glasses, and those who will start looking for someone who might be thirsty to give them their half-full or half-empty glass.

And then there are also people in the world who have a broken glass, or a glass that has been carelessly knocked over, and the people who have no glass at all.

I wish life was always about Half-Empty or Half-Full but we are so much more complex than that. For better or for worse, people around me always surprise me with the things they do and the way they look at the world, and I suppose that's what makes it interesting-- our constant desire to figure out the mysteries of the universe or the mysteries of our own selves.

[2] Sunday

It has been snowing a lot lately. The sun came out briefly yesterday but it is snowing again today. I woke up to the flurry flakes gently settling on my window pane. I stayed in bed for the longest time watching them so peacefully covering everything outside. You know, these snowflakes, they don't discriminate. They touch anything and everything with their tenderness. It makes me long for an embrace, a gentle caress and a morning smile.

This is a photo of the view from my window. I couldn't catch all the snowflakes, but you can see some. It is beautiful.

Today is a perfect day for day dreaming, curling up with a cup of coffee, and watching life pass by me. Have you noticed that snow is nature's only phenomenon which in addition to being extremely beautiful actually forces you to stop and look at it? It is all around you and comes in your way so you have to acknowledge it. In a way, snow is nature's way of letting you know that you should give yourself a break, that you deserve a break and the beauty in life no matter how many times you are dumped and rejected and felt like you were no-good. There are signs all around for those who are willing to see.

[I posted more photos of the snowfall during the past week on I Romanticize ]

The Stranger In Waiting.

Here is a confession: I have a certain fascination with strangers. I can't help but notice them and look at them for a little while longer before I move on. I wonder about their lives - in fact, I romanticize their lives, thinking where they might be heading towards, what they might be thinking, whether they are alone or if they have someone at home waiting for them - ready to embrace them. Everyday when I walk back home from work with many strange faces, I wonder if they had a good day or if it was awful for them. I wonder if they are in love or if they are going to a date from work or perhaps meeting up with friends who care really about them.  But most of all I wonder how things will change in their lives if we were to talk and get to know each other. Would it make a difference?

Here, in this photo, I was wondering what book he was reading, and I had a strong urge to go and ask him but I was too far away from him to do that. He seemed so into it and so peaceful sitting in the sun, lost in his book. I hope he was happy.

The guy in the photo is just a stranger like all the rest of us. But you know, sometimes we encounter people, perfect strangers, who begin to interest us at first sight, somehow suddenly, all at once, before a word has been spoken. I came across a certain someone like that recently, and now I have a strong desire to frame his photograph and put it in my room. I really like him. But that would be creepy, right? Really creepy. Yeah, no. :-)

Oh, Stranger.
 

Stuff That Dreams Are Made Of —

Relationships don't work the way they do on television or the end of the movies. Throughout the movie we are wondering if they will or if they won’t and then they finally do and they are happy forever. Please give me a break. Nine out of ten of them end because they weren't right for each other to begin with and the ones that get married, get divorced anyway and I am telling you right now that through all this stuff I have not become a cynic - I haven't. Yes, I do happen to believe that love is mainly about pushing chocolate covered candies and you know, in some cultures, a chicken. You can call me a sucker, I don't care. Because I do, believe in it. Bottom line is that the couples who are truly right for each other go through the same crap that everybody else does but the difference is that they don't let it take them down. One of those two people would stand up and fight for that relationship every time. If its right and they are real lucky, one of them will say something.

I have always been sure about everything in my life. I was sure of what I wanted to do and who I wanted to be with. I had a plan for everything. I used to think that if I had a plan, things will  eventually fall into place. But the truth is, you cannot plan for others, and others don’t necessarily fall into your plans either. Your partner will not always act the way you want him to, he might not do the things you expect him to, he might screw up once in a while and really push your limits. But love, as I have come to understand, is not about how much time and attention you give each other on a daily basis, but its about the decision of caring for the other no matter how you feel, and if there is anything I have learned, it is that when relationships are right, they are easy. Even when things are hard, they are easy.

At the end of the day, your heart knows exactly who and what it wants.